The Beach by the Numbers

• Adults: 7
• Kids: 6
• Times I actually went to the beach: 3
• Times it rained: around 47
• Shells collected by S: 20
• M&M's we ate: about 1200
• Pizzas: 7.25
• Ravioli: 6 dozen
• Bottles of wine consumed by 5 adults: 10
• Kids' stick-on mustaches scattered on the floor looking like fuzzy turds: 6
• Times Katherine sang to Harper about what she was doing: 100
• People who sang along to The Sound of Music: 4
• Crossword puzzles Mom & I finished together: 2
• People simultaneously reading Slam by Nick Horby: 2
• Games played: 6 (see below)
• Times I won Pretty Pretty Princess: 3
• Walks taken: around 10
• Trips to the store: 4
• Naps I took over 3 days: 5

Auxiliary List: Games Played

1. Scrabble
2. Scattergories
3. Pretty Pretty Princess
4. Simpsons Sorry
5. Simpsons Clue
6. On-line Poker

Tivo + Old Movies = Holiday Fun

Just a few movies set to record in case I have time to watch them over the next couple of weeks...

1. The Shop Around the Corner
2. The Bishop's Wife
3. Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas
4. Meet Me in St. Louis
5. Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House
6. Every Girl Should Be Married
7. Elopement
8. An Affair to Remember
9. Yours, Mine and Ours
10. Christmas in Connecticut
11. Holiday Affair
12. The Bells of St. Mary's
    

Places I Went for Work Today

1. toured a new high school just weeks away from being moved into
2. the animal shelter
3. Byhalia, MS
   

Discussed at Last Night's Bookclub Christmas Dinner

1. avocado tempura
2. wine
3. layering
4. baby's ears
5. sewers
6. earrings
7. places you should not put q-tips
8. hair
9. the stress of gift-giving
10. Christmas performances
11. myspace for grown-ups
12. Advent calendars
13. fruit
14. junk mail
15. a proliferation of Christmas gatherings
16. new kitchens
17. San Francisco and garlic
18. fake plants
19. sad Thanksgivings
    
20. farting
    

List of Stuff with No Unifying Theme

1. Cocktail Night at the Urf! House.




2. Ran in the Grizzlies House 5k and came in 806th out of 1991 runners, 408th out of all the female runners, and 38th out of my female age group.

3. Transformed into the Legion of Zoom's Most Obnoxious Fan at the Memphis Roller Derby season opener.




4. Funny sentence from the internet: "Your friend T’s completeness is: 70%."

5. Got a haircut.




6. On a recent trip to Target my purchases included 10 pairs of knee socks and a sifter.

7. Look how cute niece #3 is:




8. Really amazing art.

9. We have a new sewer line. Merry Christmas!

What We Did in Philadelphia

1. Rode a train from the airport to our hotel for $6!
   
2. Napped.
3. Saw the Liberty Bell. Refrained from spackling it.
4. Ate some comfort food at Jones.
5. Had a day of eating at divey places.
6. Walked in the rain.
7. Toured Independence Hall.
8. Saw the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier of the American Revolution.
9. Saw the oldest continuously inhabited street in America.
10. Bought a book by Elizabeth Taylor the writer, not the actress.
11. Saw a mouse in one of the aforementioned divey restaurants.
12. Napped.
13. Saw the Darjeeling Limited. Maybe cried a little.
14. Took a bus to the Italian Market.
15. Tried a cheesesteak at Geno's.
16. Tried a cheesesteak at Pat's.
17. Decided that Geno's is clearly better.
18. Bought a hat at Anthropologie, because I can't afford anything else there. It is a cute hat, though.
19. Accidentally walked 2 miles to the Philadelphia Art Museum. Saw lots of wonderful art there.
20. Went to the Rodin Museum.
21. Toured a Masonic Temple.
22. Napped.
    
23. Tried a cheesesteak at Jim's Steaks. Geno's is still better.
24. Watched Philadelphia's Thanksgiving Day Parade live and in person while eating munchkins from Dunkin' Donuts.
25. Noticed a clear difference in high school marching bands that are not from Memphis, and that clearly the Memphis variety is better.
    
26. Ate a fancy traditional Thanksgiving dinner at a restaurant. They did not have ravioli.
27. Went to the Reading Terminal Market and saw lots of lovely food that you can't get in Memphis, and lots of Amish people.
28. Ate some roast pork sandwiches - I guess it's also a Philadelphia tradition. A delicious one.
29. Went to the US Mint and saw how money is made.
30. Came home and ate some ribs.
    

Lantana Projects Class of '07

I'm on this list! The show is tonight - come & see.











Come celebrate the best artwork created in 2007
by artists from or living in the Memphis area!

Saturday, November 17
574 South Main
7:00-10:00 pm
$5 entry

Featured artists:
Lea Alexander * Elizabeth Alley * Susan Best * Sarah Boyce * Dwayne Butcher
Paul Clements * Holly Davis * Hamlett Dobbins * Melissa Dunn * Melinda Eckley
Melissa Farris * Annette Fournet * Michael Force * Brooke Foy * Richard Gamble
Ashley Gerst * Elisha Gold * Pinkney Herbert * Jed Jackson * Niki Johnson
Tim Kinard * Yijun Liao * Nancy May * Erica McCarrens * Carol Harding McTyre
Carl Moore * Sunny Montgomery * Greely Myatt * Elizabeth Owen * Catherine Blackwell Pena
Nick Pena * Joel Rose * Vitus Shell * Rumi Tominaga * Ben Utigard * Ryan VanderLey
Billy Welch * Steven Troy Williams * Tad Lauritzen Wright

Entertainment will be provided by DJs the Defective Agency and Mind at Large.

Complimentary Bar.

Now Playing in my Jeep

1. Lyle Lovett - It's Not Big It's Large
2. Yes - Highlights, the Very Best of Yes
3. Nellie McKay - Obligatory Villagers
4. Wilco - Being There
5. Cake - B-sides and Rarities
6. Rilo Kiley - Under the Black Light
7. Regina Spektor - Soviet Kitsch
8. Regina Spektor - Begin to Hope
   

Lists I've Been Working on Today

1. grocery list
2. to-do list for work
3. things to do before the trip to Philadelphia
4. things to do today
5. things to do tomorrow
   

Things in Robin's Car

1. video tape cover for the movie Greencard
2. the book 101 Puzzles in Thought and Logic by CR Wylie, Jr.
3. an Elmo toy that we could hear but could not see
4. naked Cabbage Patch doll
5. baby socks
6. goggles

Other People's Lists 3

It's like they are begging to be featured...

1. at home she feels like a tourist's 10 things I still have to do in Memphis
2. theology&geometry's Random Things That are Awesome
3. another from 5ives
   

Other People's Lists 2

1. a field guide to urban memphis' screen time - a list of possible things to do on a beautiful weekend day
2. artbutcher's Question for the Artbutcher Group to Answer, which lists local artists not getting enough exposure - lots of good discussion going on there
3. Daddy Likey's Effective and Portable Means of Self-Defense - guarding yourself from harm, fashionably
   

Cool Things at the Metal Museum

From last weekend's Repair Days at the National Ornamental Metal Museum
1. old cards



2. fire!



3. decorative metal with alligator



4. the Mighty Mississippi



5. anvil



6. more fire



7. my repaired bracelet!!!

Other People's Lists

1. John Weeden's Cool List - a fellow-list maker - just things he considers cool
   
2. RJA's Five Things About S - for her birthday, a few things about one of my favorite nieces
   
3. Secret Agent Mom's Summer in the City - regrets of things not done over the summer
4. A Field Guide to Urban Memphis's white QUILT - a long rant on global warming
5. 5ives: Merlin's List of Five Things: Five things you might do with "all that ass" - from the master, this needs no explanation
   

A Few Things That I Am Opposed To, On Principle

1. leaf blowers
2. graffiti
3. groomed eyebrows on men
4. Iron Chef America

Guestlist: Jeff Tweedy

Reasons to love Jeff Tweedy/Wilco (alternative title: Obsessed), by Click (Daily)

1) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYOfuV5ZZIY

2) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D85f5BlgOQs

3) http://www.chicagohomeless.org/

4) http://blogs.courant.com/eric_danton_sound_check/2007/05/wilco_album_str.html

5) http://click-shannon.blogspot.com/2007/01/message-and-tweedy-show.html

6) http://youtube.com/watch?v=2Bw9rFX6igU

7) http://youtube.com/watch?v=7JjmT8DWvB4&mode=related&search=

16 Things about T for 16 Years Together

1. when first dating did nice things for me, like buy dinner for me
2. gave me an easel
3. helped me get rid of a crazy roommate
4. is a good cook
5. surprised me with a new car to replace the 1972 Superbeetle
6. likes my family
7. makes me laugh
8. took me to New York, Italy & Paris
9. takes care of me when I'm sick
10. is proud of me
11. wrote a song for me
12. built most of the frame for the six paintings that I did for the Memphis in May poster
13. lets me drive most of the time
14. knows how to fix things
15. buys awesome shoes for me
16. thinks I'm funny
    

You Should Do This Tonight

1. See the show by Beth Edwards & Larry Edwards at Gallery 130, Meek Hall, University of Memphis - reception oh crap was last night so nevermind on that one. But the slide lecture is Thursday, November 1 from 2-4pm at 138 Meek Hall Auditorium, so you still have plenty of time to do that, you just can't do it tonight. (Editor's note: I really need to stop skimming. This show is at the University of Mississippi.)
   
2. See work by Michael Constantini & Brandon C. Smith at Perry Nicole Fine Art, 3086 Poplar, from 6-8pm. Lots of stripes and cows - should be good!
3. See Every One, Every Day by Hamlett Dobbins at David Lusk Gallery. This you must do.
4. Visit the Downtown Storefront Art - opening reception 6-8pm tonight at the intersection of Union and Main St. - see the first three installations by Melanie Spillman, Dwayne Butcher & Darla Linerode-Henson. There will be a dj and the Peanut Shoppe will be selling snacks. That's right - the Peanut Shoppe! There's no reason for you not to be there.
5. Go home, put on your fat pants and watch Dr. Who on the SciFi channel, followed by Best Week Ever.
   

Career Fair

These are questions that kids at the middle school career fair asked today - some were standard questions that all of them asked, some were not.

1. Do you work Monday through Friday or on weekends?
2. What other careers have you had?
3. Do you work with other people?
4. How do you dress for your job? (My answer: "Like this," pointing to what I wore today. I saw that one girl wrote down as her answer: "all black.")
   
5. What did you study?
6. What kind of skills does this job require?
7. Did you make this?
8. What is your day like at work?
9. What advice would you give to someone who wanted to do this job?
10. Do you know where the veterinarians are?
    

Food That I Am Good at Making

1. tuna salad
2. chicken salad
3. home-made frosting
4. turkey meatballs
5. french toast
6. roasted chicken
7. deviled eggs (but not as good as Julie)

I hope to start adding to this list, especially:
1. my family's spaghetti sauce (it's been too long since I've made it)
2. my great-grandmother's biscotti recipe
3. home-made cake
4. scones
5. a meat other than chicken and turkey meatballs

Guestlist: Possible Halloween Costumes

By Son of Click (Daily)

Why I Retired from Roller Derby

1. To paint more
2. To spend more time with T
3. To get fewer bruises
4. To drive to Collierville less

What I Will Miss about Roller Derby

1. my team














2. skating















3. being cool (because being the dorkiest person in roller derby still made me cooler than everybody else)




















4. my team

Favorites

From a recent game of Whoonu:

1. barbecuing
2. coffee
3. sunsets
4. mountains
5. ketchup
6. chocolate cake
7. sushi
8. airports
9. sleeping in
10. getting up early
11. fizzy water
12. bananas
13. bookstores
    

Guestlist: Mack the Knife

By RJA:
Top four performances of "Mack the Knife," originally written in the German as "Die Moritat von Mackie Messer" with lyrics by Bertolt Brecht for the music drama Die Dreigroschenoper, better known in English as The Three Penny Opera:

(in order)

1. Bobby Darin
2. Louis Armstrong
3. Jimmy Durante
4. Lyle Lovett

(Editor's Note: The opinions expressed in Guestlist are not necessarily those of the Head Listmaker - I'd move Lyle up to 2nd and add Steve Martin in there somewhere.)

Things to Do This Weekend

1. Taking Aim at Rhodes' Clough-Hanson Gallery - contemporary work from the collection of Elliot Perry. Should be awesome. 6-8pm tonight.
2. Nia Salon 3 at Marshall Arts - featuring, among others, me. 6-9pm tonight.



3. International Goat Days in Millington. Sep. 7-9. I feel this one needs no explanation.
4. Perspectives at the Brooks Museum. On view through Sep. 9 - see it now while you can.
5. Saturday, Sept. 8 - Memphis Roller Derby Championship Playoffs!
See the 2nd place Legion of Zoom battle the 3rd place Women of Mass Destruction for a chance to go to the playoffs! Also playing, Angels of Death vs. PrissKilla Prezleys.
You can buy tickets here, or at the door.

Too Much of a Coincidence?

Did I accidentally make somebody mad?

1. It's called "Piss Alley"
2. It's a list
3. It mentions art

I think RJA and I take exception to the declaration that "the alleys (sic) of Memphis are pretty gross." We do the best we can.

Guestlist: Top 5 Nick Hornby Books

By RJA

1. High Fidelity
2. How to be good.
3. A Long Way Down
4. Fever Pitch
5. About a Boy

Now Playing in my Jeep

1. Eels, Souljacker
2. Neil Diamond, 12 Songs
3. The Police, Reggatta de Blanc
4. The Police, Synchronicity
5. The Police, Ghost in the Machine

Things that Made Me Miss the 90's Today

(I know - like I don't always miss the 90's)
1. Had a dream about my old 1972 Volkswagon Superbeetle, that I drove from 1992 to 1998.
2. Drove past U of M on my way to a meeting and saw people jay-walking to get to class. It made me miss the simplicity of going to school and being responsible for myself, and not having to settle any arguments about washed aggregate vs. broom finished concrete.
3. Also drove past Brother Juniper's - possibly the main highlight of my 7+ years of school. H and I would do anything we could to get there, even skipping class! And it was always worth it.
4. Wore jeans and tennis shoes to my meeting - because it was at a construction site - and remembered when I was in school and wore jeans & tennis shoes everyday. With a flannel shirt, which I don't really miss at all.

What I Did with my Free Ticket to the Dixon Gallery & Gardens

1. Upon entering the museum, got caught making a face when I saw the fiberglass cow painted with the Blue Dog.
2. Walked into the first gallery and turned my nose up at the Blue Dog.
3. Reflected on how much I enjoy feeling superior.
4. Spent some time looking at the decorative art, which I usually skip in any museum.
5. Breathed a sigh of relief as I entered the Dixon residence, my favorite part of the museum with its musty old house smell and its lovely little Constable & Corot paintings.
6. Reveled in the jewel-like plein air paintings by 19th century artists.
7. Decided that if I were going to take 1 piece of art home with me today, it would be a tiny little painting by Henri-Joseph Harpignies, who I've never heard of, but whose application of paint is delicious.
8. Even though it's 157 degrees outside, I walked around the gardens because I had more of the Police's "Outlandos d'Amour" to listen to on my iPod.


9. Drew this fountain.

18 Years Ago, Things RJA Would Have Done if Stopped by a Traffic Cop

1. Turned down the radio.
2. Put on his shoes.
3. Removed the earring.
(Happy Birthday Old Man)

Seinfeld: the Kids' Perspective

• "I like Kramer - he's the funniest guy."
• "One time Kramer acted like he was going to hit a ball and he really hit it."
• "This other guy told a story and the people were scared."
• "There was another guy that was funny but he was only on it once. He threw something out the window."
• Conversation:
• Kid #1: "One time Kramer threw his shoe and it hit somebody. He was trying to get something out of it."
• Adult: "What was he trying to get out of his shoe?"
• Kid #1: "I don't know...maybe sand."
• Kid #2: "Yeah, that's what I was thinking.

What We Ate in Ft. Lauderdale

1. Delicious shrimp po-boy at Shuck-n-Dive - not the best shrimp po-boy I've ever had, which was at the Shuck-n-Dive but earlier this year.
2. Cuban food! Hallelujah! We have been sorely missing Cuban food since the ONE Cuban place in Memphis closed. Cuban sandwiches and one of my favorite foods in the whole wide world, mariquitas.



3. Birthday cake! Made by my sister...yellow cake with chocolate icing...also one of my favorite foods in the whole world. This was consumed repeatedly throughout the weekend.
4. Weird eggs at the Hampton Inn breakfast bar. I wish I'd thought to take pictures of them.
5. Organic pizza from Pizza Fusion. Delivered in a hybrid vehicle...just doing our part.
6. Fish tacos from The Whole Enchilada, a.k.a. The Whole Fresh Enchilada. Either way it's tasty.
7. A wonderful Italian meal with half of the family (even at half there are 8 of us) at Franco & Vinnies, complete with a carafe of Chianti, antipasto platter, lots of pasta, and a cappuccino. Molto bene. (Recommended by the lovely Terron.)
8. A pretty good snapper sandwich at Tarpon Bend on the riverfront. Would have been a better experience if the hostess had not sat us, including my sister holding the 2-month-old, in front of the speakers for the band that was about to play.
9. More organic pizza.
10. Another shrimp po-boy from Shuck-n-Dive! This time with tater tots!

3 Good Things About Getting a New Drivers License

1. It was fast, thanks to the nice lady at the counter who suggested that I use the do-it-yourself kiosk, which also lets you bypass everyone in line to get your picture taken.
2. The picture is fairly decent, though not at cute as my old one.
3. Thanks to taking the do-it-yourself route, I did not have to touch any of the clipboards, which I was thankful for after noticing a man take his clipboard into the restroom.

What I Wanted to Say

What I wanted to say to the nice looking, clean-cut young man who stopped me outside of my office and told me he had arrived in Memphis from New Orleans the day before, and asked me for money for bus fare to Omaha:

1. Why are you going to Omaha?
2. How do you not have enough money to get there?
3. Were you not already planning to go there?
4. Did something happen in the day you've been in Memphis that caused you to lose all your money?
5. Did you plan to go from New Orleans to Omaha?
6. If so, why did you not have enough money set aside to get all the way there?
7. If you make up the few dollars you are short, how will you pay for other stuff like food from here to Omaha?
8. What happens when you get there?
9. Is there a pile of money waiting for you in Omaha?
10. Can we please sit down, look at a calendar, and plan out a budget for the next couple of weeks of your life?

Where's Memphis?

List of the top fashion cities, according to The Global Language Monitor:
1 New York
2 Rome
3 Paris
4 London
5 Milan
6 Tokyo
7 Los Angeles
8 Hong Kong
9 Las Vegas
10 Singapore
11 Berlin
12 Sydney
13 Barcelona
14 Shanghai
15 Melbourne
16 Moscow
17 Bangkok
18 Mumbai
19 Santiago
20 Rio de Janeiro
21 Sao Paolo
22 Buenos Aires
23 Johannesburg
24 Dubai
25 Krakow

I've only been to 3 of these cities, but I have to question their inclusion of Las Vegas (#9). As T so aptly stated the last time we were there: "It's all fat guys and whores."

Friday Night by the Numbers

1. Number of adults present: 6
2. Number of kids present: 5 (whew, they did not outnumber us)
3. Number of drinks consumed by the adults: 16
4. Number of chilis the kids tasted: 2
5. Number of times the kids fell while climbing the door frames: 5
6. Number of times Aunt Elizabeth fussed at the kids for climbing the door frames: 5
7. Number of times GK said "baby": 1,218
8. Number of times GK said "ball": 1,104
9. Number of times RJA pestered Click about taking pictures: 3
10. Number of frozen bananas in Click's freezer: 27

What We Discussed at Book Club Last Night

1. Gilead by Marilynne Robinson
2. Mothers
3. God
4. religion
5. cake
6. drama
7. small towns
8. "head of the household"
9. cream cheese
10. cute little Colin
11. the "Creation" museum
12. curly hair
13. funerals
14. "elders"
15. birthdays
16. missing both Heathers

Trends I Noticed In New York City

1. tent dresses




2. gladiator sandals




3. the color yellow

Things I Saw in New York

1. conjoined twins walking down 42nd Street in Times Square
2. "musician" in the subway who was so bad he probably had just stolen the guitar he was playing
3. a black and white sign in the subway, hanging on an overhead beam, that said "So Tired"
4. 2 Pentecostal women walking down Mulberry Street in Little Italy
5. Dwayne's midget family
6. international gay pride parade



7. 2 different people at 2 different times playing the same kind of crazy Chinese instrument in the subway
8. the same conjoined twins the next day going the other direction on 42nd street
9. the world's largest Gothic cathedral
10. this crazy sculpture



11. man on the street with lots of feathers in his hat making bird calls and angrily flapping his "wings" as he crossed the 6th Avenue at 86th Street
12. boy in the subway with an albino Burmese python in a dog carrying case
13. the same crazy bird man in Bryant Park, making bird calls and angrily flapping his "wings"

List of Possible Things To Do in New York

Guestlist: Words Learned from Mimi K & Pampa Charlie

by RJA, but I helped

> grips = luggage
> lessons = homework
> fronts = sunglasses
> cheaters = reading glasses
> stories = soap operas
> Coke-Cola = Coke
> B.M. = poop
> sugar = kiss or hug, as in 'gimme some sugar'

What is in the Auto Emergency Kit that my Husband Made for Me

1. jumper cables
2. set of tools
3. windshield shade
4. duct tape
5. bungee cords
6. rope
7. water
8. rags
9. a funnel
10. first aid kit
11. inflatable neck rest
12. puncture seal
13. emergency blanket
14. emergency ponchos
15. flares
16. a whistle

Public Art Conference in Vegas, By the Numbers

1. Number of times I heard the word "performative": 3
2. Number of times I heard the word "banal": 3
3. Number of times Dave Hickey said "do you understand?" during his talk: 8
4. Number of times "Tilted Arc" was mentioned: 4
5. Number of people who looked at me like they were confused and I was crazy when I introduced myself to them: 5
6. Number of Year in Review projects that made me roll my eyes: 2
7. Number of Year in Review projects that were awesome: at least 10
8. Number of times Jaume Plensa used the words "obsessed" or "obsession" during his talk: 10
9. Number of times people jumped line in front of me while I was waiting patiently to meet presenters: 4
10. Number of pictures I took at the neon boneyard: a bazillion



11. Amount of money I gambled with: $1
12. Amount of money I won: $0

Ways the Original "Yours, Mine and Ours" Is Better Than the Remake

1. Lucille Ball is better than Rene Russo.

2. Henry Fonda is better than Dennis Quaid.

3. Frank Beardsley is a military man - the original is in the Navy, but the 2005 version is in the Coast Guard - that's not really the military, is it?

4. In the original, the two families did not get along because they were two different families. In the 2005 version, they felt the need to make a more obvious difference between them, so they don't get along because the Beardsleys are military and the Norths are hippies.

5. The original had one of the North kids, Phillip - a cute little 6- or 7-year-old who kept getting the short end of the stick - sort of narrate the movie. Or maybe he was just in it a lot - anyway, he was cute. (Played by Eric Shea - also in the original Poseidon Adventure - maybe I'll do that list later.)

6. The 2005 version had a pig as a family pet. Ewww.

7. The original showed the difficulties of raising a family with 18 kids in a light-hearted and cute way. The 2005 version relied on Dennis Quaid falling into various liquids.

8. The original had this fantastic quote from Frank Beardsley/Henry Fonda: "All the crazy haircuts in the world won't keep it (life) turning. Life isn't a love in, it's the dishes and the orthodontist and the shoe repairman and... ground round instead of roast beef. And I'll tell you something else: it isn't going to a bed with a man that proves you're in love with him; it's getting up in the morning and facing the drab, miserable, wonderful everyday world with him that counts."

My Favorite Nieces & Nephews

In no particular order...


HE



C



JP



S



GK

Tips for Giving Presentations

1. Do not use your sinus rinse the morning of a presentation, as it might make your nose drippy all morning.
2. Wear sturdy shoes in case you have to kill any giant cockroaches while setting up for your presentation.
3. Don't make your presentation too good, or you will be asked to give it again to different groups.

Things You Should Do This Week & Next

1. Saturday, May 19, 7:00-midnight at Powerhouse (45 GE Patterson)




2. Thursday, May 24, 6:00 PM
Studio visit at MY STUDIO! Sponsored by Delta Axis - see their site for more information.


photo by Click (Daily)

3. Saturday, May 26, doors open at 6:00 PM, Collierville Funquest, 440 HWY 72 - buy your tickets here!

Guestlist: Top 22 Elvis Costello Bonus Tracks

By RJA: Top 22 Elvis Costello Bonus Tracks That I Own
(in no particular order)

1. Everyday I Write the Book (Alternate Version) – Punch The Clock, bonus disc
2. Watch Your Step (Live) – Punch The Clock, bonus disc
3. Put Your Big Toe in The Milk of Human Kindness (Demo) – Spike, bonus disc
4. Stalin Malone (Vocal Version) – Spike, bonus disc
5. Pouring Water On a Drowning Man (Alternate Version) – Rhino Extras: Kojak Variety
6. The Dark End of the Street – Rhino Extras: Kojak Variety
7. Crimes of Paris (Electric Version) – Blood & Chocolate, bonus disc
8. American Without Tears No. 2 (Twilight Version) – Blood & Chocolate, bonus disc
9. Radio, Radio – This Year’s Model, extended play (Rykodisc)
10. Green Shirt – This Year’s Model, extended play (Rykodisc)
11. My Funny Valentine – Armed Forces, extended play (Rykodisc)
12. Alison (Live) – Armed Forces, extended play (Rykodisc)
13. Tracks 14-22 – My Aim Is True, extended play (Rykodisc)
14. That Day is Done, with The Fairfield Four – All This Useless Beauty, bonus disc
15. World’s Great Optimist (Demo) – All This Useless Beauty, bonus disc
16. The Comedians (Demo) – All This Useless Beauty, bonus disc
17. Suffering Face (Solo Demo) – King of America, bonus disc
18. Betrayal (Outtake) – King of America, bonus disc
19. A Drunken Man’s Praise of Sobriety – Brutal Youth, bonus disc
20. Rocking Horse Road (Demo) – Brutal Youth, bonus disc
21. The Land of Give and Take – Imperial Bedroom, bonus disc
22. Really Mystified – Imperial Bedroom, bonus disc

10 of the Ugliest and Dumbest Things Anyone Has Ever Said

1. If you're not a born-again Christian, you're a failure as a human being.
-- Rev Jerry Falwell
2. AIDS is not just God's punishment for homosexuals; it is God's punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals.
-- Rev Jerry Falwell
3. The idea that religion and politics don't mix was invented by the Devil to keep Christians from running their own country.
-- Rev Jerry Falwell
4. It appears that America's anti-Biblical feminist movement is at last dying, thank God, and is possibly being replaced by a Christ-centered men's movement which may become the foundation for a desperately needed national spiritual awakening.
-- Rev Jerry Falwell
5. The Jews are returning to their land of unbelief. They are spiritually blind and desperately in need of their Messiah and Savior.
-- Rev Jerry Falwell
6. I do not believe the homosexual community deserves minority status. One's misbehavior does not qualify him or her for minority status. Blacks, Hispanics, women, etc., are God-ordained minorities who do indeed deserve minority status.
-- Rev Jerry Falwell
7. AIDS is the wrath of a just God against homosexuals. To oppose it would be like an Israelite jumping in the Red Sea to save one of Pharoah's chariotters.
-- Rev Jerry Falwell
8. Textbooks are Soviet propaganda.
-- Rev Jerry Falwell
9. Christians, like slaves and soldiers, ask no questions.
-- Rev Jerry Falwell
10. And, I know that I'll hear from them for this. But, throwing God out successfully with the help of the federal court system, throwing God out of the public square, out of the schools. The abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked. And when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad. I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way -- all of them who have tried to secularize America -- I point the finger in their face and say, "You helped this (September 11th) happen."
-- Rev Jerry Falwell

R.I.P., freedom hater!

A Few Fun Things about Roller Derby

1. People loan you awesome cars



2. Roller derby kids



3. Friends



4. Silver boots

A Few Things about the BBQ Shop

• I haven't been there in many, many years, but all my friends love it.
• The menu states that pulled pork (as opposed to chopped up fine) costs an extra 25 cents.
• They give you a choice of bread.
• Barbecue beef? This is Memphis.
• The BBQ itself? Slightly sweet but otherwise bland.
• The slaw is okay.
• At $3.75, it is more expensive than Tops.
• At least mine


looked better than this.

Get to Know Your Blogger

1. New: Thoroughly entertaining interview of my very own husband, The Saucier, by blog-hog Stacey.
2. Stacey dines with a Chockley at EP Delta Kitchen!
3. S.A.M. i.m.'s StephChockleyBlog.
4. Stacey Greenberg right here on Listwork.
5. Me! Elizabeth Alley interviewed by Urf!
6. RJA of Urf! interviewed by StephChockleyblog of One of Each, part 1 and part 2.
7. More to come as soon of the rest of these people get on the ball.

Five Reasons You Should See My Show Tonight

1. Free wine, maybe free beer (though donations are strongly recommended).
2. Paintings of rollerderby girls, plus real live rollerderby girls may be present.
3. See how I have managed to include actual movement in my artwork.
4. See paintings of a foreign country, though not necessarily of Spain as the Memphis Flyer stated.
5. Find out the answer to Hamlett's question, "How is EA going to fill that space?"

Guestlist: Top 8 Driving Songs

by Guest Blogger RJA

As a younger man I drove for a living. I transported packages across town as a courier and shuttled people as a chauffer. One of the delights of these jobs, other than spending the days free of four walls, was listening to the radio. This is a list of the Top 8 Driving Songs that I can remember from my time as a professional driver in the early to mid-90s. These aren't songs that are necessarily in my own music collection, nor would I necessarily listen to these while sedentary on my couch, but they're tunes that would pop up on the radio, prompting me to take the long way around. They made the list due to their length or their indubitable drivability. Songs are in no particular order.

1) Paradise By The Dashboard Lights --Meatloaf
2) American Girl -- Tom Petty & the Heartreakers
3) Walk On The Wild Side -- Lou Reed
4) Sympathy For The Devil -- Rolling Stones
5) Can't You Hear Me Knocking -- Rolling Stones
6) Bohemian Rhapsody -- Queen
7) Panama -- Van Halen
8) The Boys Are Back in Town -- Thin Lizzy

20 Things that Make ME Happy

1. Making lists
2. Sketching
3. Coffee
4. Licking the yogurt off of the inside of the yogurt lid
5. Overhearing conversations among my nieces and nephews
6. Having a stack of New Yorkers to read at my leisure
7. Clean sheets
8. Office supplies
9. Grids
10. Peanut butter & jelly sandwiches
11. Coca-cola light
12. Revolving doors
13. Terrazzo
14. Hearing T laugh at a show I'm not watching
15. Sorting
16. The smell from the Wonder Bread factory
17. This sign


18. Scarves
19. Finishing a painting
20. Sleeping late

Where in the World is Elizabeth Alley

1. Well, I'm here and here as often as possible. Also here.

2. On Urf!

3. Friday night I hope to be at all the openings on South Main.

4. This Saturday, April 28th from 1:00 to 4:00 PM I'll be at 1910 Frame Works, 2029 Union Avenue, signing Memphis in May posters.

5. Next Friday night, May 4, 6:00 to 9:00 PM, I'll be at the opening of my show Please don't leave anything behind, at Marshall Arts, 639 Marshall.

Lists from High Fidelity, the Movie

1. All-time top 5 breakups
2. Top 5 Monday morning albums
3. Top 5 musical crimes perpetrated by Stevie Wonder in the 80's
4. Top 5 side 1 track 1
5. Top 5 dream jobs
6. Top 5 things I miss about Laura
7. Top 5 songs about death: a Laura's dad tribute list
8. Songs at my funeral
9. All-time top 5 favorite records

Listmania! with Stacey Greenberg

As part of Get to Know Your Blogger, I sent Stacey Greenberg of Fertile Ground, Dining with Monkeys, and Chop Fayn a list to make lists out of. And even though she's been all over town leaving lists in other people's comments, the following is what you get when you ask someone adept at writing things like sentences and paragraphs to make a list:

List 1: 3 Things I would do if I won the lottery:
Well I never buy lottery tickets so this is an impossibility. If given a large sum of cash, I have no idea. I imagine I'd pay my bills, save a little, and then establish some sort of foundation. Ok that's boring! I'd buy MRD their own warehouse with everything needed to host top notch bouts. Then I'd totally trick out Evergreen Montessori so that it would have the best materials, best playground, best teachers, low tuition, etc. If there was anything left, I'd probably quit my job and spend a good deal of time traveling. (In the VW Camper Van of Warren's dreams.)

List 2: 3 Famous people that I'm totally in love with:
I'm not totally in love with any famous people I don't think. I used to have a thing for Parker Posey. Once I met her and had my picture taken with her it fanned the flames a bit. I also used to be madly in love with Patrick Stewart, but really only in his role as Captain Jean Luc Picard of the Starship Enterprise. (My sister actually met him and told him I was in love with him.) I think lately I prefer to develop crushes on people I see in real life. It's more satisfying.

List 3: 3 Favorite blogs:
Well beyond my inner circle (Listwork/Sketchwork, Urf!, Sassy Molassy, Bar-b-log, Click Daily, Secret Agent Mom, Chockley blog) I have to say that I really enjoy Mel's Only in Memphis blog, the Gates of Memphis, My Midtown Memphis, and Squirrel Squad Squeeks. I also like crafty blogs like Soule Mama and helpful blogs like Parent Hacks.

List 4: 3 Things the average person does not know about rollerderby:
The average person I think has no idea how much of a time commitment it is with practices, committee work, league meetings, etc. and how much each girl gives of herself to make it work. Also, I'd say that the average person probably doesn't get the satisfaction that we feel when we get a big ol' nasty bruise or how much one's body aches after a practice/bout.

List 5: 3 favorite dishes that I've reviewed:
Ooh another sneaky one!! Fish tacos at Las Tortugas, Spicy tuna pizza at
Blue Fin, and Bacon Wrapped Stuffed shrimp at Cafe Ole. (These were actually the first three I ever did!)

List 6: 3 Things I enjoyed about having a 5-kid slumber party:
Hmmm...it was really fun just to say it and see the fear in most people's eyes! It was fun seeing how everyone interacted (Satchel & Jiro knew everyone, but not all of the other kids knew each other). I enjoyed having an excuse to get Memphis Pizza Cafe. I enjoyed getting to see our nice big yard get a LOT of action. I enjoyed seeing my boys enjoy themselves.

List 8: 3 Things I regret about having a 5-kid slumber party:
I didn't like getting up at 6:30am on a Saturday morning!! (Even my early birds will sleep until at least 7:45am.) I worry that some precedent has been set and that soon we will be having slumber parties every weekend! (The parties where the parents come and then everyone leaves before bedtime are much more fun! ha!) Uh...I can't think of anything else, which is a good sign. Besides the lack of sleep, it really was fun! Oh, I guess you could say I regret that all the other midtown bloggers got together
w/o me and that Kristy even cooked dinner. Losers!!

Auxiliary List - By the Author:
3 Things that I know about Stacey:
1. She still limps, with her left foot sort of out to the side. I'm not sure if she knows that she does this.
2. She is incredibly easy to talk to - I think mostly because she likes to ask a lot of questions, which just leaves me talking about myself a lot, which I really enjoy doing.
3. She seems to bring the same amount of enthusiasm to all of her efforts: being a mother and wife, being a writer, playing for the Memphis Roller Derby in the Legion of Zoom...even organizing get-togethers!