Thursday, December 31, 2009

The Aughts

I have been wanting to do an end-of-decade list, but the task seemed daunting, so I just started writing down words & phrases that pertained to the Aughts and figured that would suffice. This includes good and bad and is in absolutely no order:
  1. elopement
  2. Spain poster
  3. marathon
  4. Florence, Italy
  5. xanax/traveling better
  6. Paris
  7. 9/11
  8. Naples, FL
  9. Joshua
  10. Somerset
  11. Genevieve
  12. Harper
  13. Robin's wedding
  14. 10-year reunion
  15. home ownership
  16. 2 car family
  17. same job all decade
  18. co-workers and interns coming and going
  19. office flood
  20. Hurricane Elvis
  22. canoeing the Mississippi River
  23. new friends
  24. girl trips
  25. crocheting
  26. library controversy
  27. Blue Parkways
  28. interim director
  29. robbery
  30. PTSD
  31. Max, Clara, Zeta, (were Sam and Abby born this decade?), Mia, Sherube, Henry, Liv, Annabelle, Nicholas, etc., etc., etc., etc.
  32. Eddie Izzard
  33. Facebook
  34. Sketchwork
  35. Listwork
  36. Artwork
  37. Urf!
  38. Tobacco Bowl
  39. Because I Said So
  40. Dennis
  41. shoes & boots from Toby
  42. Weirdest Christmas
  43. Happiest Christmas
  44. rollerderby
  45. broken arm
  46. boxing
  47. Formula 1 racing
  48. baseball
  49. White Sox in the World Series!!!
  50. Spoon
  51. Lord of the Rings trilogy
  52. Wes Anderson movies
  53. Jane Austen books
  54. shows at Perry Nicole
  55. road trips
  56. diabetes
  57. Katherine's wedding
  58. Heather's wedding
  59. Amelie
  60. Lost
  61. cell phones & texting
  62. running
  63. pilates
  64. Project Runway
  65. (more importantly) Tim Gunn
  66. cocktail hour
  67. so many paintings

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Books I Could Totally Re-Read RIGHT. NOW.

  1. Pride & Prejudice, Jane Austen
  2. Emma, Jane Austen
  3. The Pleasure of My Company, Steve Martin

To the Girl in the Blue Honda Driving East on I-40 This Morning

  1. If you can see that the driver ahead of you in the left lane cannot get into the right lane, it does no good to stay on that person's behind.
  2. Once the person ahead of you, whose behind you are on, does get over to the right lane, you need to actually pass them.
  3. Both of the above items require you to actually pay attention as you are hurtling a giant machine down the road at 75 mph.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Guestlist: Wii!

Top Four Phrases Yelled While Playing Wii on Christmas Day:
by Click (Daily)

1. Would you stop killing me?
2. Dad, I have a bomb.
3. Kill them all and let's get out of here.
4. Die! Die! Die!

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Guestlist: Veggie Time

Things I did today to encourage my kids to eat fruits and vegetables
by Stephanie Chockleyblog:
  • Let them get out of the shopping cart and choose their own fruits and vegetables
  • Made ranch dressing for the vegetables
  • Made cream cheese/marshmallow puff dip for the fruits
Fruits and vegetables eaten by my kids today:

Friday, December 18, 2009

Cartoon Characters I Tend to Resemble

1. Velma from Scooby Doo

2. Marcie from The Peanuts

3. Edna Mode from The Incredibles

Tweeting Traffic Court

Since not everyone here is on Twitter, and because I crack myself up, I'm making a list of what I tweeted while standing in line for traffic court.
  1. At 201 for traffic court, trying not to breathe in.
  2. Not supposed to have my phone on in here, but wanted to make sure y'all are aware the kid in front of me is grinding his teeth.
  3. Not sure why I bothered showering today.
  4. How many times can you reapply Purell before your skin starts to sting?
  5. Answer: 57 times in a 70-minute period. Ouch.
  6. BIG EXHALE and a hazmat shower.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Favorite Versions of Favorite Christmas Songs

I love Christmas music. I love that we have particular music for one time of year. I've been listening to WRVR non-stop for days just to hear Same Old Lang Syne by Dan Fogelberg, just so I can call my sister and hold the phone up to the radio (or computer), and noted that there are a number of really terrible - Seriously. Really. Terrible. - Christmas songs out there. There are also terrible versions of my favorite songs. Here is a list of antidotes to the terribleness.
  1. Winter Wonderland - Johnny Mathis
  2. Baby, It's Cold Outside - tie between Dean Martin and Leon Redbone/Zooey Deschanel
  3. Santa Baby - Eartha Kitt
  4. Five Pound Box of Money - Pearl Bailey
  5. Christmas Time Is Here - Vince Guaraldi
  6. White Christmas - Bing Crosby
  7. Santa Claus is Coming to Town - Jackson 5
  8. The Christmas Song (Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire) - Nat King Cole
  9. Blue Christmas - Elvis Presley
  10. It Came Upon The Midnight Clear - Johnny Mathis
  11. 'Zat You, Santa Claus? - Louis Armstrong
  12. something by Rosemary Clooney... probably Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas?
  13. O Holy Night - Johnny Mathis
  14. Do You Hear What I Hear - St. Louis School Choir circa 1985... we always rocked that song

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Songs with Questionable Status as Christmas Songs

  1. My Favorite Things - I love this song, but what does it have to do with Christmas?
  2. Mama Liked the Roses - It's on the Elvis Christmas album, but doesn't even mention the holiday.
  3. O Come O Come Emmanuel - Okay, I get the sentiment with this one, but it is not what I would call festive.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Schnucks on Union - 2 Lists

Why I Still Go to Schnucks on Union Even though I Hate It:
1. It is exactly 1 mile from my house.
2. It is apparently the only store in Memphis that carries the toothpaste my husband likes.
3. Can't get enough of their rotisserie barbecue chicken.

Changes Schnucks Can Make That Will Keep Myself and Other Shopping There:
1. Stop stocking the shelves between 5 and 6 PM, including removing the stocking carts from the already narrow aisles.
2. Stop being out of everything that I need.
3. When you are out of something, leave a space empty where that product should go so that I don't walk around the store for 10 minutes thinking that product must have been moved to another area.
4. Teach the cashiers who need it the fundamentals of customer service.
5. Since you always seem to be caught off guard by all of the customers wanting to check out between 5 and 6 PM, I'm going to let you in on a secret: You have a lot of customers in the store between 5 and 6 PM, and should maybe up the number of registers open at that time.
6. Move the display table that is in front of the customer service window - you know, the one that leaves about 2 feet of space on either side of it, right when you are entering the store?
7. Make the first driveway, the one closest to the store, exit only.
8. Improve all entrances and exits, and the signs and arrows associated with them, including the less obvious ones to the adjacent parking lot and the one off of LeMaster.
9. Expand east like you said you were going to a couple of years ago.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Guestlist: Top 5 Long-playing Record Albums of 2009

By My Husband

1. "Hombre Lobo: 12 Songs of Desire - Eels
2. "God Help The Girl" - God Help The Girl
3. "Fortress 'round My Heart" - Ida Maria
4. "Electric Dirt" - Levon Helm
5. "Far" - Regina Spektor

Honorable Mention: "Those Darlins" - Those Darlins

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

States I Don't Like to Drive Through

  1. New Jersey
  2. the rest of Alabama
  3. Florida
  4. Louisiana
  5. Mississippi
  6. eastern part of South Carolina
  7. Wyoming
  8. Most of Kansas
  9. Missouri

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

States I Like to Drive Through

  1. Tennessee
  2. Virginia
  3. Pennsylvania
  4. Vermont
  5. Oklahoma
  6. Kentucky
  7. the northwest portion of Alabama
  8. Arkansas

Monday, December 7, 2009

Weird Things in my Dream Last Night

  1. gorillas
  2. elephant sculptures - hundreds of them
  3. Dr. Seuss-like trees with giant curled-up orange, yellow and brown leaves on them
  4. my mother-in-law hanging up on me

Thursday, December 3, 2009

3 Signs I Should've Stayed in Bed This Morning

  1. got spaghetti sauce all over myself while checking on it in the slow cooker
  2. poked myself in the eye with mascara
  3. banged up my hand while making the bed

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Roadtrip by the Numbers

  • Miles: 3304.1
  • Driver: 1
  • Navigator: 1
  • Dead deer on road: 11 or 12
  • Live deer on road: 3
  • Places we passed named Somerset: 3
  • Hampton Inns we stayed in: 6
  • Amount of money we gambled in Atlantic City: $5.25
  • Number of times I'd like to return to New Jersey: 0
  • New England states we've been to now that we've been to Vermont: all of them
  • Times we visited Primanti Brothers to get sandwiches with fries on them: 2
  • Times we called Vermont "cute": about 50
  • Times we said Virginia looks fake (because it is too pretty!): also about 50
  • U-turns: at least 9
  • Horses wearing blankets: 4
  • Brew pubs/microbreweries: 2
  • Pizza places: 3
  • Ladybugs in various hotel rooms: 5
  • Waterfalls: 4
  • Covered bridges in Vermont: 3
  • Amount we spent on toll roads: probably around a million dollars
  • Amount we spent on one breakfast in a hotel IHOP in Canada: also probably around a million dollars